Metallic tartan, cheeky torsos, and a little FOMO: JPG’s holiday bottles

If you’ve ever been seduced by a perfume bottle before you even sniff, welcome to my confession booth. This season, Jean Paul Gaultier is strutting out limited edition torsos in metallic tartan, and I’m already side-eyeing my shelf space with dangerous optimism.

Two usual suspects get the festive wardrobe. First, Le Mâle Elixir in 125 ml at $180. The scent is that plush, burnished take on the Le Mâle idea, richer and darker, with ambered vanilla and a cozy sweetness that clings to scarves. It’s a club chair at midnight kind of warmth, no reinvented wheel, just maximum purr. Then there’s Divine in 100 ml at $184, the salty-sweet siren that plays floral on the surface, gourmand in the heart, and maritime at the finish. It’s polished, feminine without fuss, and surprisingly moreish on skin.

The twist here is the outfit. Metallic tartan reads playful and a little subversive, more glam-rock kilt than twee holiday jumper. On the shelf, these will throw light like a disco ball, which is either irresistible or a dealbreaker if you hate fingerprints. Do not expect reformulations or secret “holiday accords.” This is collector territory, the kind that turns gifting into theater and sends bottle nerds into eBay rabbit holes when they hesitate.

Yes, the prices have crept into gasp territory, and yes, you are paying for the dress. If you already own Le Mâle Elixir or Divine, ask yourself if the metallic plaid makes your heart beat faster. If the answer is no, stick with your current bottle and a festive ribbon. If you’ve been hunting your first full size and love a bit of spectacle, this is a painless way to get the juice you wanted with the kind of packaging that feels like an instant heirloom.

They’re due out later this month. Blink and the lemmings will have carried them off, but blink twice and you might realize you only need one. My pick to watch is Divine in tartan, because that salty-sweet gleam paired with chrome checks is deliciously wrong in the right way.